You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
