One girl and one boy is just not enough.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
