He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
