we have pet lesbian snakes
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
