who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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