I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
