Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
