FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize
