So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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