It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
foreskin is a definite game changer
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
