I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize