pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
that's an acceptable place to lick
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Randomize