we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
