I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
tell me about the eggs
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
