just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
