just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
