he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
