Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
