This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
