why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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