Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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