it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
