Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
