Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
