These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It's never too late to be topless.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
