I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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