no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I think I sprained my soul last night
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
