I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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