i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
