I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
