your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
