Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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