Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
