How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize
