it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We don't watch enough power rangers
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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