I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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