We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
