and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
