Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
