So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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