I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
