Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
