i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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