She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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