how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
zippers are such a cool invention
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
