He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I love you.
Bad choice
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
