i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Im part way to drunk.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
