Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
These tits shall not be calmed
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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