...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
