White coat. Heels.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I need moral support for this bender
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
