tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize